Yesterday, in the midst of my self improvement revelation, I created a list in which I challenge myself to become a better person.
Many people see me as, well, not exactly the nicest person. My mother says I don't have very good social graces. It's pretty much true, because I have a hard time hiding the way I feel- so if I don't like someone or something, it's fairly evident.
I used to pride myself on being an individual, but then I came to realize that this perception others have of me was not entirely accurate. Sometimes I may come across as short and snappy, but in all honesty, I have the biggest most emotional heart, and I truly care about the livelihood of others. We are talking about the fact that when I was five years old, I was afraid to step on grass in case it would get hurt. A girl that, to this day, is JUST LIKE Andy from Toy Story with my stuffed animals. Toy Story 3 had me bawling like a little kid when he gave his toys to the neighbor girl. My stuffed animals are real to me, and I'm extremely attached to them. But I don't play with them any more, and they belong with someone who will love and cherish them the way I did. As I was going through my stuff on Monday night, and putting the stuffed animals in the give away pile, I was definitely shedding tears. My understanding husband came over to me, put his arms around me, and said "Toy Story 3". I was all "I know..." but it is true, and that is what gave me the push to sever that bond. Sad day.
So that is who I am. The type of girl who will cry over news stories when someone dies, thinking of the pain and suffering the family is going through. The type of girl who has to pull over after driving past a wreck on the interstate to keep from wrecking herself because she's hyperventilating in tears of pain for those hurt or killed from the accident. That's just me.
So this list I speak of involves actions to promote the awesome side of me, the one who cares about other people even if I'm not always pleasant. Everyone's personalities are different, but I don't want anyone to ever question whether I'm compassionate or thoughtful. So it's not just a list to check things off after I've done them, like the 101 in 1001 that I'm working on. (Which reminds me- I need to revamp that list...) This is basically a change in the way I think about things, and living a healthier life, both mentally and physically.
You can see my list by clicking "it's all in the details"
I plan to blog about my progress on that list here on this blog, and keep my life tinted purple blog just for the 101 in 1001.